God Rest Ye Merry Lipoproteins
(To the tune of "God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen"
Copyright ©2002 Kevin Ahern

I am very pleased that Mr. Tim Karplus has made a professional recording of this song (complete song downloadable HERE) and others can be downloaded HERE. You will need to unzip the file to release the MP3. I am providing all songs for free download, but hope you will support this effort by purchasing my Metabolic Melody albums or calendar at the URLs at the bottom of the lyrics to this song.

Instructor Sings

God rest ye merry dieters
With high cholesterol
Your chylomicrons all contain
Triacylglycerols
And move from lymph to capillaries
Where their progress stalls

Everyone sings

Tha-anks lipo protein li-pase,
Protein lipase
O-oh thank you lipo protein li-pase

Instructor Sings

And after their fat goodies
Have been hydrolyzed away
The chylomicron remnants
Go along their merry way
The liver grabs them from the blood
And puts them all away

Everyone sings

Just as we should do with Kenneth Lay,
Kenneth Lay
O-oh just as we should do with Kenneth Lay
(Note - He's the Enron guy)

Instructor Sings

And when the liver gets a message
From the body's cells
It makes up little packages
We call VLDLs
They seem like chylomicrons, but turn
In to something else

Everyone sings

Please don't become the LDLs ,
LDLs
O-oh please don't become the LDLs

Instructor Sings

For LDLs cause chaos
When their insides oxidize
The macrophages bind to them
And foam cells can arise
You'd better watch your diet
Or your blood flow will downsize

Everyone sings

And that would not be very wise,
Very wise
No-oh that would not be very wise

Instructor Sings

So if you take some lessons from
This little comic bit
Your diet should be healthy
And you should try to stay fit
Eat greens and drink red wine but try
Not to overdo it

Everyone sings

And your heart will never ever quit
Want to quit
No, no your heart will never ever quit

Complete list of Metabolic Melodies HERE

Support the Metabolic Melodies

Writing, recording, posting, and delivering the Metabolic Melodies for download is not a trivial amount of expense. Help support the Metabolic Melodies by buying our products below.

Buy the Book
The "Splendidest Ever Metabolic Melodies" Songbook HERE

Buy the Calendar
Metabolic Melodies calendar for 2012 HERE