God Rest Ye Merry Dieters
(To the tune of "God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen"
Copyright © 2002 Kevin Ahern

Tim Karplus' recording HERE

God rest ye merry dieters
With high cholesterol
Your chylomicrons all contain
Triacylglycerols
And move from lymph to capillaries
Where their progress stalls

Tha-anks lipo protein li-pase,
Protein lipase
O-oh thank you lipo protein li-pase

And after their fat goodies
Have been hydrolyzed away
The chylomicron remnants
Go along their merry way
The liver grabs them from the blood
And puts them all away

Just as we should do with Kenneth Lay,
Kenneth Lay
O-oh just as we should do with Kenneth Lay
(Note - He's the Enron guy)

And when the liver gets a message
From the body's cells
It makes up little packages
We call VLDLs
They seem like chylomicrons, but turn
In to something else

Please don't become the LDLs ,
LDLs
O-oh please don't become the LDLs

For LDLs cause chaos
When their insides oxidize
The macrophages bind to them
And foam cells can arise
You'd better watch your diet
Or your blood flow will downsize

And that would not be very wise,
Very wise
No-oh that would not be very wise

So if you take some lessons from
This little comic bit
Your diet should be healthy
And you should try to stay fit
Eat greens and drink red wine but try
Not to overdo it

And your heart will never ever quit
Want to quit
No, no your heart will never ever quit

 

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